I read an interesting post today on themalePOV.com about why guys ask girls for their numbers and then don’t call. Apparently, it can get a little more complicated than “he’s just not that into you”, as blogger Joe Everyman states:
If you want to understand a primary reason men don’t call back, turn to some sportsman cable TV channel that has hunting, monster trucks, and bass tournaments. Pay attention to the bass tournament show. If you notice, these tournaments are about catching as many fish as you can in a short period of time and winning a trophy. It’s not about catching fish to eat. The rule for the tournament is catch-and-release. These fishermen participate in these tournaments to display their skills, not because they’re hungry. Fish are elusive, challenging animals to catch that hide in nooks, deep water, between rocks, etc. Women do too. They travel in intimidating large groups, make themselves unavailable in exclusive social settings, and go out with male friends they have no romantic interest in so they can fend off the wolves. Some men love to take on this challenge, just like the bass fishers. We especially like to test our skills if we’ve been out of “the game” for a while with a steady relationship or family duties. Sometimes, we’ll go out with the boys for some sport fishing just to see if we still have it and can get women interested enough to give us the digits. Then we don’t call because that night it was a catch-and-release tournament at the bar. All we want is a trophy (phone number) from the biggest fish we can land.
I like that he’s honest about comparing the dating world to bass fishing…I’m not into the sport, but I can see the relation. Women do travel in groups (especially to bars) for safety reasons as well as to hang with friends. But ladies if you do meet a guy you like, be prepared that even if he acts interested and gets your number he might not call. He doesn’t want a relationship, he wants to play. This can be hard to remember after a few drinks.
Joe Everyman goes on to mention other things that cause him not to call back: like when he checks you out with his friends to see your track record (have you dated one of his friends or acted crazy towards another?), or feeling turned off by a woman who was too aggressive in her pursuits.
The disappearing act has happened to me more times than I care to acknowledge. But the thing to remember is, if you are looking for a real relationship, these elusive bass fishers aren’t for you. So don’t get hung up on the cute guy who asked for your number the other night. Move on, because he has.
About Kelly Seal
Kelly is a freelance writer based in Los Angeles, CA. She blogs about dating, relationships, personal growth and what "healthy living" means to her. You can follow her on Google+, Twitter @kellyseal or through her website www.kellyseal.com.
Brilliant conclusion – your writing style is great! Thanks for the headsup about the article too.
Moving on is always the best plan. This is one guy trait I have long decided not to over-analyze or agonize over.