It’s officially the end of summer. (Collective sigh.) Soon it will be chilly and dark by 5pm, and I’m sure there are some unhappy campers out there who are wrapping up vacations and saying goodbye to your summer flings.
Yes, it sucks.
Summer is over, which means it’s likely your tryst is over, too. But just because you had a brief yet great time, the fact that you never hear from or see someone with whom you felt such intense chemistry with is not necessarily a bad thing. Hear me out.
Flings are incredible. They rekindle that emotion in you that might have abandoned you months before when your ex walked out. Or maybe it’s been a while since you felt such a connection with anyone. Regardless, they have lifted you out of your near-catatonic dating state. They have helped you to believe that passion and chemistry and desire really do exist. And isn’t that a great thing?
I had a few flings when I was single, and I look back on all of them fondly, even if some of the guys ended it in a completely douche-baggery way. It doesn’t matter, it wasn’t meant to last. What does matter is how much we enjoyed our fling in the moment, and how it left me optimistic again about dating. There’s nothing like a gorgeous guy to help you be totally present, am I right?
I met a man on a plane to Australia a few years back, (before I knew my husband of course). We talked and flirted the entire plane ride without sleeping, which was like 12 hours. But I wasn’t tired. The chemistry was ON, and besides, he was hot and he was Australian. What’s not to like? We exchanged numbers and met up again. He took me to little places that only he with native knowledge would know about. We couldn’t keep our hands off each other. It was incredible, and it was brief, but I knew it would be. Neither of us had any intention of staying in touch. But my time with him left an impression on me – he had given me a little hope about dating, a sense of joy, and some much-needed optimism.
I got back on the plane to head home, and decided to join a new online dating site. I accepted invitations to every party. I went out 4-5 nights a week. I felt I could actually attract men again, which for me at the time was quite an accomplishment since I was so jaded with being single in L.A. And a month later, I met my husband, quite accidentally. I’m certain it’s because my Australian man had reminded me what chemistry feels like, and that it was possible to feel it again – even in the most unexpected times and places.
So if you’re missing your summer fling, take heart. This is just the beginning of a new chapter.
About Kelly Seal
Kelly is a freelance writer based in Los Angeles, CA. She blogs about dating, relationships, personal growth and what "healthy living" means to her. You can follow her on Google+, Twitter @kellyseal or through her website www.kellyseal.com.
I totally agree that flings have their place in single life. They can boost the ego and brighten perspective. The glow of a renewed attitude and confidence will attract a mate quicker than a new little black dress 🙂
Agreed. It’s all about attitude.
I’ve never really had that seasonal fling where I knew the girl was leaving at the end of it. I’ve always tried to hook up with that girl that works with me on the summer job, but it never worked out. Now I feel like I’ve missed out!
It’s never too late Q! (Even if it’s not summer.) Everyone should have a little fun at least once. Maybe over the holidays?