My attraction to new beginnings has never been motivated by the start of a new year, or by the first signs of spring. I don’t do spring cleaning. New Year’s Eve is overrated. For me, it’s all about the fall. I think it hit me the morning of my first day of fourth grade, when I realized summer vacation was over and I’d have to go back to school. I remember sitting in my kitchen, new backpack and pencils in hand and new shoes on my feet. I’d be starting again with a blank slate. I’d be in a new class, with new people. I could make new friends. I could reinvent myself. I knew that work and courage was required. Change was expected, and I had to adapt.
But instead of scaring me, I was excited by the idea of change. Of a blank slate.
I was thinking about this as I helped my stepdaughter pack her backpack for the first day of school this morning. It was kind of surreal in a way. Two years ago, I never would have pictured this scenario. I would have been heading in late to the office, nursing my hangover from the Labor Day weekend with coffee. I would have called one of my friends to complain about my last online date. The only responsibility I had was to myself. My life barely had room for dating, let alone a relationship and an instant family.
But then I met Jeff mostly by accident, and life was different. I skipped the honeymoon period and baby years and went straight into trying to help parent – figuring out how to do fractions again, or navigate the social dramas of a pre-teen. I’m still figuring things out. But the great thing about September is knowing that I have a blank slate – that I can do things differently, that I’m learning and changing and that’s the way it should be. I have a chance to do it differently this year.
In honor of the start of fall, I’m going to try not to make any assumptions about where I’ll be in a year, two years, or ten years. I will resist the urge to plan or control too much, for fear of getting in my own way. I will let life happen, and see what opportunities present themselves.I will try to wake up each morning and remind myself that I’m a blank slate, able to change and grow and see things differently. As much as I can.
Because the thing is, the saying is true – the best and most unexpected things in life are the ones we don’t plan for. New beginnings.
About Kelly Seal
Kelly is a freelance writer based in Los Angeles, CA. She blogs about dating, relationships, personal growth and what "healthy living" means to her. You can follow her on Google+, Twitter @kellyseal or through her website www.kellyseal.com.
I feel the same way about new beginnings. The school year hasn’t started for me yet but that’s always when I make my resolutions and think about what I want to do differently. Can’t wait to start with my blank slate again soon.
Cheers for new beginnings! It’s true! two years ago I didn’t expect to be where I am but when I read your article I realized how many good things have happened since I try to let go and resist to control everything around me.