I’ve been watching the new Stephen Merchant comedy Hello Ladies, mostly for research purposes (ha!). It’s an interesting and horribly insightful look at dating in L.A. For those of you who don’t know, he’s a comedian and Ricky Gervais’s writing partner for shows like The Office. He’s also 6’7″ and single, and decided to write a TV series based on his failed love life.
At first, I just cringed at his awkward attempts to pick up women. He’s gangly first of all, so it’s pretty genius how the camera captures the difference in height between he and every woman he dates. He never quite knows how to stand (he kind of fidgets, squats and leans in), or even how to interact. When he tries making a move, I have to hide my eyes. He’s so uncomfortable in his own skin. But then, he also thinks he’s the shit. He’s got a house in the Hollywood Hills (with a guest house he rents out to an aspiring actress who just rolls his eyes at all of his attempts to pick up her gorgeous friends—hmmm, could there be romance between them?), and he tries to live the Hollywood life—clubs, parties, hook-ups, etc., but he doesn’t actually get the art of flirting, or just talking to women in general.
He, like a lot of men in L.A., has this unrealistic vision of dating only really hot women.
By this I mean models and actresses, specifically in their 20’s even though he’s in his late thirties. He’s in love with a model on a billboard he passes on Sunset Blvd. He desperately tries to meet her, or someone like her. He thinks this is the woman of his dreams. He won’t settle for less.
I really, really, want to sympathize with him. He’s so misguided and has these grandiose ideas about the life he’s supposed to have, but he really just wants to find love. But then I saw an episode where he was flirting with some normal, pretty Midwestern girl, and she seemed ready to go for it with him, and he immediately dumped her for the chance to be with the beautiful actress he met for like five seconds. It’s this kind of thing that makes me crazy. I hated him for that. Mostly because it’s so true, especially in L.A. Is everyone so superficial in their pursuit of love that they are always looking for someone “better”?? (i.e. prettier)
This makes for great TV, and I have to admit I like the show, even though I’m totally turned off by his relentless quest. He even gives tips to one of his co-workers about how long to wait before texting a woman back (a few hours-keep her guessing) and what to say (be smooth, reference something she said so it looks like you were listening). I hate to say it, but it was awesome. It was like The Game threw up all over that exchange. Of course it later backfired on him.
Anyway, I’m hoping that more people watch this, especially those with unrealistic expectations. It’s kind of hard to have a relationship with someone you see as arm candy. But then, doesn’t it take more than a few rejections to come to this conclusion? As Stephen Merchant admits in interviews, “he’s like a 15 year-old in a thirty-eight year old body.”
L.A. daters, check it out.
About Kelly Seal
Kelly is a freelance writer based in Los Angeles, CA. She blogs about dating, relationships, personal growth and what "healthy living" means to her. You can follow her on Google+, Twitter @kellyseal or through her website www.kellyseal.com.
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