I was having dinner Friday night with a couple of girlfriends, and we were discussing our dating standards. Like most girls, they set the bar high: they want the prince—handsome, charming, financially secure, smart, and romantic. The perfect man. After all, we are perfect ourselves, or at least, we have worked hard on becoming strong, independent, sexy women. We’ve held out for Mr. Right. Why shouldn’t we get exactly what we want?
I hate to say this ladies, but our visions of the prince swopping in to provide us with some kind of fairytale ending is only setting us up for disappointment. No, we as human beings are not perfect, but there is a thing called chemistry which binds us together if we give it a chance. The only problem is, I think we as women are overlooking our chances at romance and fulfillment by carrying around our visions of the ideal partner, and comparing that vision to whoever we meet.
I’m not advocating settling. I’m advocating openness. Instead of waiting for the tall guy with a full head of hair and nice arms to appear magically at the next party you attend, why not start talking to the interesting and funny guy with big ears? Sometimes we aren’t attracted immediately to the physical type of a person, but chemistry is more than physical attraction. It’s about connection. And sometimes, if we go outside our “type” and take real interest in the people who cross our paths, we could find something interesting and worth exploring.
Instead of setting your standards only around the outside package, try flirting with someone who doesn’t fit your type. Maybe the reason why you haven’t met anyone of substance is because you don’t really know what you want.
About Kelly Seal
Kelly is a freelance writer based in Los Angeles, CA. She blogs about dating, relationships, personal growth and what "healthy living" means to her. You can follow her on Google+, Twitter @kellyseal or through her website www.kellyseal.com.
Great post and one that has stuck a chord with me as I have realised my standards are much higher than I thought. So much for being totally open minded and laid back. I feel a new post brewing on this very topic.
God, I love you. The short, skinny men of the world – well this is now their favourite blog.
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I recently tried this “out-of-the-box” flirting and have been pleasantly surprised. Great post!