Today’s guest post comes from Kara Pound, a writer at the fabulous website where I get some of my love stats, DatingAdvice.com. The subject? What to do when someone is lusting after you and you’re not feelin’ it. Read on…
One of the saddest things in life has got to be a boy who is in love with a girl and she doesn’t love him back.
It’s been the plot in thousands of films and even the reason wars have been waged. Let’s say you’re said girl and you are friends with said boy. He’s professed his undying and passionate love for you. So how do you let him down gently?
Here are some tips and tactics to telling a friend you’re just not that into him…
Be sensitive.
Anyone who has gone out on a limb to tell another person his or her feelings is in a vulnerable state. That’s why it’s so important to be sensitive and let him down gently. (i.e. Don’t laugh and say, “Are you serious?”) Instead, tell him he’s a great guy but you don’t look at him in that way.
Be honest.
The number one mistake a woman can make when telling a guy she’s not interested in him is to give him a glimmer of hope there’s still a chance it could happen one day in the future. If you know 100 percent you’d never date this guy, then admit it. Don’t respond, “Well, you never know. My feelings could change tomorrow.”
Be timely.
Some men just don’t have the balls to do this sort of thing in person – admitting they are in love with a friend. If that’s the case and he sends you a room full of roses or a week of love letters, then it’s up to you to tell him right away how you feel. He’s probably nervous just thinking about your reaction, so don’t let him sweat.
Some men say it with jewelry and some say it with a poem. Whichever way your guy friend tells you he’s been secretly in love with you, there are a few key things to keep in mind when letting him know it’s just not going to happen.
Be sensitive. Be honest. Be timely. Hopefully you’ll be able to salvage the friendship after this whole “in love with you” issue has been cleared up.
Kara Pound is a writer for DatingAdvice.com. She writes on a variety of dating and relationship subjects, including how-to articles and do’s and don’ts for dating. DatingAdvice.com is a one-stop site with a collection of dating experts who dispense wisdom on “all things dating” daily.
About Kelly Seal
Kelly is a freelance writer based in Los Angeles, CA. She blogs about dating, relationships, personal growth and what "healthy living" means to her. You can follow her on Google+, Twitter @kellyseal or through her website www.kellyseal.com.
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